sigh…why

I have a secret. when i was 12 i was molested and i kept that secret for years. i never had the courage to tell my parents. i didnt know what to do. i kept it and i became withdrawn. i never wanted to go anywhere i always wanted to be alone. i pretended for 4 long years that everything was ok. one night i was talking to my best friend (and the love of my life) in florida. i told him what happened and he was mad. he convinced me to tell my mom but i refused. i told him if i told i dont know what would happen because it was a complicated situation. eventually i grew some balls and i told my mom about it. she was distraught and that made me cry ;( i felt horrible. even worse when i confronted the bastard he said he had no idea what i was talking about. that made me feel worse. why would i lie about something like that? why would i ruin someones reputation for no reason. that saturday was the worst saturday of my life. i called jake and my other bestfriend Aneysa and i told them about the situation and i cried to them and i said he denied it, even tho everyone believes me i still feel like shit because i just wanted him to apologise so maybe i can move on. he said sorry but how can u say sorry for something u never did? thats just messed up. up to to this day OCTOBER 19TH ive neverfully recovered im still sad but ive found some happiness. ive learned how to love and trust a male and ive gained two friends that i hope ill be keeping for a life time. i love Jacob and Aneysa because they were there for me the first time ever told anyone. also my friend ariel, she’s the only friend i told that lives in Antigua with me. shes a good person and it makes me smile whenever she expressed how much shes wants to kick the bastards ass for messing up mylife those three people will always remain in my heart.JACOBANEYSAARIEL